enter the void...

which is my brain.

is shaq playing for the suns now? not that i pay attention to that stuff but it looked like that when i walked past the news.

i finished reading "the other boleyn girl", and now am looking forward to the movie. i had assumed that scarlet would play anne boleyn, but was suprised in the trailer to see it was the sweet natalie portman. i've been sucked into reading and watching all things queenly and historical lately, i blame my sisters and wendyB. i think i need a different time and era.... also i'm better with someone else being beheaded rather than me.

all i do is sleep, eat, read and go to work. my employees have totally spoiled me. i show up late and leave early. everyday ashley says "what are you going to do with your afternoon?" somehow giving me the benefit of the doubt that i could be fun. my reply everytime "take a nap".

i don't think i'm slipping into a down cycle, but the fact that i sleep constantly, won't leave the house unless i HAVE TO, am drowning in bills due to my lack of work could be an indicator. i really do believe that it is up to us what we become, whether we are rich or poor, and i don't know why i want to be rich but somehow always choose to be poor. that probably doesn't make any sense, but i have gotten myself stuck in a cycle that is only drug down lower by the void in my head.

um, too much insight? sorry, as sweet sarah mentioned "blogging is cheaper than therapy" and since my insurance (that is supposed to be so wonderful) still won't pay for a routine dr's appt from last november, i'm going to skip the shrink this month.

good night to you all, may we all wake up excited for the day and rich in spirit and wealth. if not just don't jump off a bridge, hey we all gotta have affirmations right? here is my list i have posted in a few places in the house (don't make fun, you know you lie to yourself too):


I have a perfect memory.
I have more time in my day than I need.
Everything I do is successful.
I have more money than I will ever need.
I remember everything.
I am perfectly healthy in everyway, through every cell in my body.
I am happy , healthy, wealthy and wise.
I am always on time
I weigh 130 pounds and am a size 8. I can eat anything I want and stay my perfect weight.
I have more new and existing customers that I can service.
I have happy customers.
I am joyous, happy and full of love for all.
I have $5million in our retirement account.
I love all fruits and vegetables.
I am a positive force and draw like people to me.
I truly love myself.
I hear everything because I have perfect hearing.
I always win.
Life is easy and all good things come to me.


now that you've had your laugh, what lies do you tell yourself?