He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that is actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or somethg

my father has analogies for EVERYTHING, so today I have decided to share with you my feelings on the presidential candidates we have to choose from.

I am ambidextrous. I write with my left hand, but I throw, cut and put on mascara with my right hand. Got it, I really need both. I prefer having both.

Picking a candidate this election is like choosing which arm I prefer to have cut off.

God bless this country, we are in big trouble.

note: this is my idea of election coverage (click here)
don't get it? click here

pps. also a must read for choosing a candidate (click here)

HOT date!

we kid swapped with the neighbors this weekend so everyone could get a date night, we got to go out Friday.

It was Macaroni Grill and then off to a movie... so we thought. after dinner we got in the car and when you should have heard a "vroom vroom" sound, there was silence....

after establishing, yes I did have jumper cables in the car - but no other car to hook them to we decided that since the battery had to be changed anyway we would hoof it over to Walmart. (thank goodness I brought the sling for the baby.... oh ya - and the baby)

the following is my documentary photos from my cell phone:



When I noticed that the battery he was holding was heavy I asked him if he wanted me to put it in the sling, he got a good laugh out of that. Thank goodness because after a long day of work my feet and back were killing me. Not killing me as much as our big night out ending at Walmart though!


self checkout - that's hot!

self installation - even hotter

(did I mention it's stinking hot here still at night? and I HATE bugs!)
note: baby wipes were helpful in cleaning off the "corrosion" and Dave's hands, see I was helpful besides taking pictures of him working.

between quoting movie lines, and coming up with ridiculous situations (we love to play the "what if" game - we are weirder than you think) we really had a good time. Besides at a movie we wouldn't have gotten any exercise, or been able to crack each other up the whole time!

My dearest Husband, thank you for a funky time (see I can quote stuff all day), till next weekend, lets try this again!

the end.

walk like an egyptian (in payless shoes)

thank you to my friend David for yet another fabulous Halloween hand-me-down! this beaded hat has been a hit here now that she found matching shoes!

finally: the reason for the "practically" in practically perfect

lets all agree that you've seen these little gems at the grocery store. they actually make your 3 year old princess DEMAND that they be sitting for the grocery experience, yeah big bulky weird car thing - right?! (you can't SEE the germs in the picture, but they are there!)

so cart loaded with bags of groceries (paid for of course - no, not by food stamps yet, we are holding out on registering for those till the recession gets really good! fingers crossed {sarcastically})

anyways, I have my sleeping bundle in his carrier and we are making our way into the parking lot, realizing I just took two kids to the grocery store, I'm really a Kick-A mom.... when out of my peripheral hearing (yes when you are nursing and sleep deprived you get "peripheral hearing") i hear in a very familiar voice coming from way behind me "mommy mommy mommy!" - hu, that's weird, it sounds an awful lot like the princess who is sitting in the big germ infested car on the front of this cart. I turn around anyway to see, if this princess found her mommy. Yep, she did - ME.

I don't know at what point during the check out process she ditched the germ machine, but there she was, not with me - with the bagger from my checkout line. now before you call CPS the RSVcoach does not have airbags or a rear window for me to see the passengers.

let this be a lesson to all, if you can't hear crying, whining, screaming, pouting, breaking, snoring, scratching or puking - something is wrong- check the kids!


and in the book of Mary Poppins: if you loose even one little child at the grocery store, you are not yet perfect, but you may keep trying.
and trying.

and try a little more.

do your Christmas shopping Tuesday and Wednesday: THATS AN ORDER!

click here or pictures for the link to the sale
I think this nie nie doll is amazing, I can only imagine the price tag! It is worth every penny! click here to see the ongoing auction price

Sorry to my Jewish followers (you know who you are) this post can also be called "do your Hanukkah shopping Tuesday and Wednesday....."

ps. am i the only one who got on less than two hours after the start and everything was gone? wow that is amazing, good luck to all tomorrow!

give-o-give away

my friend Sarah is celebrating her brand new Etsy store with a giveaway on her blog! Scroll down to her Tuesday post and leave a comment to enter! For double entry just link to her blog like I did here.

I hope I win, Prince Harry really wants his mom to have that bag! (sorry Donna, it's too late, the name has stuck.)

good night

*If you would like to donate your stuff to a cancer fundraising yard sale or silent auction see next post of click here.

*If you want a SERIOUSLY FUNNY blog that my wonderful sister megan told me about (don't take it tooo seriously) click here

*most importantly - if you want some amazing jewelery, IMMORTALITY, and t0 donate to a good cause click HERE! and if you need some encouragement you can click here, here, and here (Wendy should be a full time philanthropist!)

princess jojo says "bid on the necklace already!"

looking for local stuff to help woman with cancer:

PLEASE HELP:

I received this email from my cousin yesterday, I would ask anyone local to see what they can donate. You can drop anything by the shop, or someone would be happy to pick up your stuff!

you can email me at: daveclancyfamily(at)yahoo{dot}com

_______________________________
Hi everyone!

As the holidays approach - I have to think that I am not alone in needing to get rid of "stuff" around the house to make some room and de-clutter. I would like to make a personal plea that if you have anything you would like to get rid of, I have a cause that is more than worth while to donate to.

I work with a friend who is, and has been for some time, struggling with liver cancer. She is a single mother of two and someone that any of us could easily relate to. She is nearing the point of being able to receive a donated liver and her brother has stepped up to help in an incredible way, but will be struggling to pay for travel expenses and time off of work for his surgery and tests. There are several fund-raisers in the works.

If you have anything to donate to the yard sales, being held the first two weekends in October, to raise money for this family, please let me know and I would love to come pick up whatever you have.

Also, if you have any goods or services to donate to a planned silent auction being held in November, please let me know.

I know that I can help this family and appreciate you considering doing the same.

Betsy

one of these things just doesn't belong

(does this remind anyone else of ET?)

(Prince Harry in the Princess's bed)

I think it's going to be hard to have a controlling older sister.... (just ask these people 1, 2, 3, 4 )

feeling wicked

in my excitement to order enough tickets for Wicked, and the lady at ASU (who was obviously equally excited) we ended up with 8 extra tickets to the play next July (yes July 2, 2009). I'm sure it won't be a problem finding homes for these little gems, but in the mean time I thought I would offer them to any of you who were dying to be wickedly popular by hanging out with my family next year.

click here for my favorite song

buy a Diana 4 Nie Nie

my beautiful friend and jewelery designer extraordinaire, WendyB, is doing an auction for the Nie Nie recovery fund! She is offering many extras the higher the bid goes, INCLUDING IMMORTALITY!!!

I was so excited to see how it was going this morning when I got up after another rough night with my "Prince Harry" that I wrote her an email to thank her! Here is her response:

"I had a moment of shock when I saw "Prince Harry" and I was like "OMG! THE QUEEN IS EMAILING ME!":-D

Well, I think you're much more fun than the queen. She seems tightlywound. Please pass around my link as much as possible. I am hoping to get past the retail price....I want to give a treat to anyone who double that :-) "

so come on people, click anywhere in this post to get to Wendy's post and donate - generously - it's for a good cause, and this necklace if AMAZING!

now donate!!!

update: as of Sunday night it is already up to $290! wooo hooo! i feel someone is going to be "immortal" by the end of the week!!!

New York Times Article

about the nielsons -

click here

in the fashion section - OF COURSE!

Happy Birthday little sis!

My little sister Megan turns 20'something today!

I love you, have a wonderful day!!!

kisses, me

Christian update:

finally some good news, our prayers have been felt!

click here

my dogs are not normal!

remember this?

well now guess what she did....

how in the world do dogs just decided... "I think I will chew out of my cage today, mmmm I love the taste of chicken wire in the morning!"

i've heard we look alike....

Happy Anniversary to my Mom and Dad

This is the letter in my email inbox when I got up this morning....
______________________________
Dear Children,
Our eternal family started 37 years ago today. Thank you for coming to us. Our family wouldn't be complete without YOU. We love you oh, so very much! We can't imagine heaven being heaven without one of you, including your sweetheart and darling children. Our family means the world to us.

Eternal love to all of you and ones to still come.
Mom and Dad
I love you too Mom and Dad, thank you for the sweet letter, and putting up with your crazy children and still loving us despite it!
xoxoxoxoxo

dance party - whose moves did she get?

You could imagine my excitement when the princess was flipping through the music channels and stopped on Joan Jett's I LOVE ROCK AND ROLL and rocked her pants off (literally she had to go get her ballet skirt for the occasion)! you go girl - shake your booty like your mommy taught you!!! I knew she had great taste in all things old and new!


So I was not ready for the shock of her enthusiasm for the next song by Journey, maybe she did get her daddy's taste in music. look on the bright side, if she ever gets on 80's or 90's Rock and Roll Jeopardy she will be taking home some nice cash and prizes!

then we danced to jam on it, by Newcleus - ok so far it's a draw.....
don't forget to take time to take care of others!

but I realized as I was about to take credit for her next song Parliement's Flashlight (sweet jam), as she danced on top of the laundry basket, that probably she was just too lazy to change the station.

Yep, mommy girl!